{"id":94,"date":"2016-05-12T12:36:25","date_gmt":"2016-05-12T12:36:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ozananitulescu.ro\/blog\/?p=94"},"modified":"2020-02-13T17:24:01","modified_gmt":"2020-02-13T15:24:01","slug":"incongruenta","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ozanamiron.ro\/blog\/incongruenta\/","title":{"rendered":"Incongruen\u021ba"},"content":{"rendered":"

Am \u00eenceput mai demult o serie de articole despre congruen\u021b\u0103. Am scris despre ce este<\/a> \u0219i cum este<\/a> ea, dar imaginea nu poate fi complet\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 opusul sau lipsa ei: incongruen\u021ba. Spun asta pentru c\u0103 \u00een noi nu exist\u0103 de regul\u0103 congruen\u021b\u0103 sau incongruen\u021b\u0103 \u00een st\u0103ri pure, ci \u0219i una \u0219i cealalt\u0103 – ele se completeaz\u0103 \u0219i sunt \u00eentr-o permanent\u0103 dinamic\u0103.\u00a0Termenul \u201eincongruen\u021b\u0103\u201d este unul amplu \u0219i – de\u0219i nu se rezum\u0103 la asta – se refer\u0103 inclusiv la\u00a0ceea ce \u00een afara psihoterapiei rogersiene intr\u0103 \u00een sfera psihopatologiei. Astfel, el este cel mai apropiat concept pe care abordarea \u00eel are de no\u021biunea de \u201eboal\u0103\u201d sau de cea de \u201etulburare\u201d.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Din perspectiva psihoterapiei centrate pe persoan\u0103, incongruen\u021ba este<\/strong> (the root of all evil :D)<\/span>\u00a0chiar ceea ce psihoterapia caut\u0103 s\u0103 rezolve<\/strong>. Este o nepotrivire, o neconcordan\u021b\u0103 sau contradic\u021bie \u00eentre diferite aspecte ale selfului \u0219i\/sau \u00eentre ceva din self \u0219i mediul de via\u021b\u0103. Astfel de nepotriviri exist\u0103 orice am face, dar dac\u0103 ele ocup\u0103 prea mult din energia noastr\u0103, afect\u00e2ndu-ne \u00eentr-un fel sau altul calitatea vie\u021bii, atunci e cazul s\u0103 ne \u00eendrept\u0103m aten\u021bia asupra lor \u0219i s\u0103 \u00eencerc\u0103m s\u0103 le dezleg\u0103m c\u00e2t mai cur\u00e2nd – psihoterapia fiind una dintre cele mai eficiente c\u0103i pentru acest lucru.<\/p>\n

Teoria dezvolt\u0103rii personalit\u0103\u021bii<\/a>\u00a0a lui Rogers spune c\u0103 incongruen\u021bele apar ca urmare a influen\u021bei condi\u021biilor de valorizare. De exemplu,\u00a0un copil care \u00eenva\u021b\u0103 c\u0103 nu trebuie s\u0103 pl\u00e2ng\u0103 atunci c\u00e2nd este trist, sau c\u0103 motivele lui de sup\u0103rare nu sunt \u00eentemeiate (pentru c\u0103 exist\u0103 multe alte lucruri mai grave, de pild\u0103), va \u00eencerca din r\u0103sputeri s\u0103 nu mai pl\u00e2ng\u0103, sau s\u0103 nu mai fie sup\u0103rat. Nu va reu\u0219i, pentru c\u0103 pl\u00e2nsul \u0219i sup\u0103rarea sunt normale, naturale, inevitabile. \u0218i atunci le va camufla \u0219i va g\u0103si alte manifest\u0103ri pentru triste\u021be, care sunt acceptabile pentru persoanele semnificative din jurul lui, sau va dezvolta mecanisme elaborate dar \u00eentr-un fel sau altul restrictive pentru a-\u0219i gestiona sup\u0103r\u0103rile – va forma incongruen\u021be.<\/p>\n

Despre o incongruen\u021b\u0103 este vorba atunci c\u00e2nd vorbesc despre ceva trist, dar z\u00e2mbesc, sau dac\u0103 sunt furioas\u0103, dar pl\u00e2ng… Tot cu o incongruen\u021b\u0103 m\u0103 confrunt \u0219i c\u00e2nd nu pot s\u0103 suf\u0103r oamenii dezordona\u021bi, dar de fapt \u0219i eu sunt dezordonat\u0103. Incongruent\u0103 sunt \u0219i atunci c\u00e2nd, de exemplu, cred despre mine c\u0103 sunt puternic\u0103 \u0219i c\u0103 pot s\u0103 le duc pe toate, dar de fapt sunt la cap\u0103tul puterilor \u0219i nu mai apuc s\u0103 am grij\u0103 nici de mine. Dar o incongruen\u021b\u0103 poate ap\u0103rea \u0219i atunci c\u00e2nd ceva din exterior, din condi\u021biile mele de via\u021b\u0103, se schimb\u0103 \u0219i eu nu reu\u0219esc s\u0103 m\u0103 adaptez corespunz\u0103tor pentru o perioad\u0103 lung\u0103 de timp.<\/p>\n

Incongruen\u021bele pot fi mai superficiale sau mai profunde, \u00een func\u021bie de c\u00e2t din self afecteaz\u0103 \u0219i pentru c\u00e2t\u0103 vreme. Ce au ele \u00een comun, \u00eens\u0103, este o neacceptare, nerecunoscut\u0103 \u0219i neasumat\u0103, a ceva din interior sau din rela\u021bia cu mediul<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Felul \u00een care mi le imaginez eu este c\u0103 sunt ca ni\u0219te zone aride (din selful ca o p\u00e2lnie<\/a>), care sunt \u00eemprejmuite de ziduri \u0219i s-au deconectat de celelalte zone din jur. Sunt mai mult sau mai pu\u021bin statice, rigide, \u00eenghe\u021bate – nu au acela\u0219i ritm de dezvoltare cu al celorlalte zone, sunt refractare la nou \u0219i la schimbare, sunt blocate \u0219i func\u021bioneaz\u0103 dup\u0103 ni\u0219te reguli care nu mai sunt neap\u0103rat actuale sau potrivite cu situa\u021bia prezent\u0103. Ele fac totu\u0219i parte din self \u0219i se manifest\u0103 \u0219i ele, cum pot mai bine, chiar dac\u0103 sunt discrepante cu restul.<\/p>\n

De multe ori, incongruen\u021bele unei persoane pot da impresia de falsitate, sau de ciud\u0103\u021benie, sau de rigiditate sau se pot traduce \u00een exterior prin tot felul de atitudini \u0219i comportamente de neacceptare \u0219i respingere – ceea ce \u00eei poate face pe ceilal\u021bi s\u0103 reac\u021bioneze defensiv sau agresiv fa\u021b\u0103 de persoan\u0103 – ceea ce poate duce la \u00eent\u0103rirea incongruen\u021belor, cre\u00e2ndu-se astfel un cerc vicios. Primul pas \u00een \u00eentreruperea lui este intrarea \u00een spatele zidurilor, \u00een zona arid\u0103. Ie\u0219irea de pe pilot automat \u0219i orientarea aten\u021biei c\u0103tre ce \u0219i cum se \u00eent\u00e2mpl\u0103. Recunoa\u0219terea incongruen\u021belor cere \u00een primul r\u00e2nd simpla observare a lor.<\/p>\n

Poate este deja evident din ce-am scris p\u00e2n\u0103 acum, dar \u00een psihoterapia centrat\u0103 pe persoan\u0103 nu exist\u0103 diagnostice<\/strong>, \u00een sensul clasic al cuv\u00e2ntului. Nici ideea de boal\u0103. Toate tulbur\u0103rile clasificate \u00een diverse manuale sunt privite drept incongruen\u021be \u0219i explicabile \u0219i \u00een\u021belese procesual. Felul \u00een care este \u0219i se dezvolt\u0103 un om este privit \u00een ansamblu, dinamic \u0219i personal. De aceea se \u0219i nume\u0219te psihoterapie \u201ecentrat\u0103 pe persoan\u0103\u201d, pentru c\u0103 nu se concentreaz\u0103 pe problem\u0103, pe simptom, pe ceea ce nu merge bine sau ar trebui \u00eembun\u0103t\u0103\u021bit, ci pe persoan\u0103 cu totul.<\/p>\n

Am avut la un moment dat o client\u0103 care mi-a spus c\u0103 primise la un moment dat un diagnostic, dar cu care foarte mult timp nu a \u0219tiut ce s\u0103 fac\u0103. Era ca o etichet\u0103 care \u00eei era str\u0103in\u0103 \u0219i care o \u00eendemna la o rezolvare care \u00een cea mai mare parte nu era \u00een m\u00e2inile ei. \u00cen ultima \u0219edin\u021b\u0103 mi-a spus c\u0103 psihoterapia centrat\u0103 pe persoan\u0103 a ajutat-o s\u0103-\u0219i dea seama ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 pentru ea personal lucrurile la care se referea diagnosticul, cum tr\u0103ie\u0219te cu ele \u0219i cum \u0219i ce dore\u0219te s\u0103 schimbe la ele \u0219i la ea astfel \u00eenc\u00e2t s\u0103 fie mai mul\u021bumit\u0103 de via\u021ba pe care o tr\u0103ie\u0219te. Acest lucru a fost posibil pentru c\u0103 a putut s\u0103 recunoasc\u0103, s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleag\u0103 \u0219i s\u0103 accepte la ea acele lucruri care foarte mult timp fuseser\u0103 privite ca neacceptabile, chiar dac\u0103 f\u0103ceau parte din realitatea ei. A putut astfel s\u0103 le gestioneze mai bine \u0219i s\u0103-\u0219i transforme incongruen\u021bele \u00een congruen\u021b\u0103.<\/p>\n

Congruen\u021ba \u00eenseamn\u0103 consonan\u021b\u0103 \u0219i fluiditate. Incongruen\u021ba este, dimpotriv\u0103, blocaj \u0219i nepotrivire.<\/strong> Pare foarte simplu c\u00e2nd sunt scrise a\u0219a, \u0219i \u00eentr-o anumit\u0103 privin\u021b\u0103, lucrurile chiar sunt simple. \u00cen acela\u0219i timp, sunt at\u00e2tea de zis despre ele! \u0218i dac\u0103 mai iau \u00een calcul faptul c\u0103 lucrurile foarte rar r\u0103m\u00e2n la fel pentru perioade lungi de timp, sau c\u0103 nimic nu e doar a\u0219a sau doar altfel, pot s\u0103-mi prind urechile c\u00e2t a\u0219 zice pe\u0219te<\/a>! \ud83d\ude42 O s\u0103 mai tot scriu, deci, despre congruen\u021b\u0103 \u0219i incongruen\u021b\u0103, \u00eentr-un fel sau altul.<\/p>\n

C\u0103ut\u00e2nd o imagine care s\u0103 mi se par\u0103 potrivit\u0103 cu articolul am dat de una care mi se pare tare, tare simpatic\u0103!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Iluziile<\/a>
Am g\u0103sit-o aici: http:\/\/www.moillusions.com\/blivet-devils-fork-illusion-collecton\/<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Am \u00eenceput mai demult o serie de articole despre congruen\u021b\u0103. Am scris despre ce este \u0219i cum este ea, dar imaginea nu poate fi complet\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 opusul sau lipsa ei: incongruen\u021ba. Spun asta pentru c\u0103 \u00een noi nu exist\u0103 de regul\u0103 congruen\u021b\u0103 sau incongruen\u021b\u0103 \u00een st\u0103ri pure, ci \u0219i una \u0219i cealalt\u0103 – ele se … Continue reading Incongruen\u021ba<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Incongruen\u021ba - nepotrivirea dintre con\u021binuturi ale selfului \u0219i\/sau dintre ceva din self \u0219i mediul extern, care are la baz\u0103 o neacceptare.","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[18,23,31,30,25],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\nIncongruen\u021ba - 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